


There's no regrets (if it's with you)

by hereforthehurts



Series: The Mom Eda fic masterlist [3]
Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Caretaking, Comfortember, Comfortember 2020, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Mom eda rights yet again y'all, Panic Attack, luz having panic attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:55:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27604535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hereforthehurts/pseuds/hereforthehurts
Summary: Eda had a lot of regrets in her life.Except... for this one particular little human girl named Luz.
Relationships: Eda Clawthorne & King & Luz Noceda, Eda Clawthorne & Luz Noceda
Series: The Mom Eda fic masterlist [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2013046
Comments: 7
Kudos: 132
Collections: Comfortember 2020





	There's no regrets (if it's with you)

**Author's Note:**

> For comfortember day 17 and 24: flashbacks + panic attacks

Eda was accustomed with King barging up to her room and slamming it open. It was probably due to his lack of manners and sense of privacy, being a demon and all, but Eda doesn’t bother with it that much. She usually just lets him do what he wants and deals with it as casually as possible.  
  
So when the small demon ran across the hallway only to slam her bedroom door open a few moments later, Eda wasn’t exactly _that_ surprised. “What is it, King?” she asks in a monotone voice, not taking her eyes off the book she was reading. “I’m busy.”  
  
“Luz! Eda, Luz, she’s—” he’s panting, trying to catch his breaths while holding on to the doorframe. “Luz, we were painting in the sunroom, and she’s—she just suddenly dropped her brush and started breathing really fast—I think she’s possessed!”  
  
“What?” she dropped her book down almost immediately at the mention of Luz. “What do you mean, possessed? What happened before?”  
  
“Nothing! We were completely fine one second, and then suddenly—boom! She’s not responding to me, and she’s staring to the distance like—Eda? Wait—where are you going?”  
  
She didn’t respond to King as she abruptly ran into the hallway, running as fast as her feet could take her. She knew this was coming, sooner and later—and with the amount of nightmares she had been having for the past weeks, it was just about time until Luz has her panic attack in broad daylight.  
  
And apparently, that day is today.

Eda couldn’t help but curse herself the more she thought about it. Luz was _fourteen_ —it shouldn’t be her, dealing with the aftermath of what had happened during their fight with Belos. Eda was supposed to protect her. And she’d failed at that too, just like she failed with everything else in her life.  
  
She should’ve told the girl to come back home the first time she met her.  
  
But no, right? No, of course that’s not what she did. She was too reckless, too selfish to do that. Instead, she got attached to her, and look where they are now. It should’ve been her. It should’ve been her. _It should’ve been her._  
  
“Luz,” she says once she finally arrived at saw the girl, tears in her eyes, her fingers clutching her chest while she breathes heavily. A cup of black paint spills on the ground, while she rushes to her aid. “Luz, Luz hey, it’s okay. It’s okay, kid. You’re okay.”  
  
“Eda—” the girl managed to choke out, shaking her head. “Eda, you—”  
  
“Shh,” The woman cuts her off, pushing Luz’s body against the wall and guides her to lean on it, helping her stay grounded. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Just breathe.”  
  
Luz did what she was told, hand now gripping her arm as she struggled through her breaths. Eda watched carefully as she slowly begin to regain her normal breaths before she stifled a small sob, and her heart breaks for her all over again.  
  
“Oh, Luz,” Eda mutters, pulling her into her lap and wrapped her arms around her. “I’m sorry, kid. I’m sorry.” _I’m sorry because I was so careless with you. I’m sorry that I’m selfish because I was lonely and I pulled you into all this mess. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry._  
  
“It’s—‘s okay,” Luz says between her breaths and suppressed sobs. “It was just… scary, I guess.”  
  
“I know. And you’re brave.” She tells her, gently lifting her chin to make her look up. "You're brave and I'm here, I've got you. Okay?"

"Okay," Luz nodded. "Okay."

“And—Luz, I’m sorry. For what happened. I should’ve—I should’ve protected you better.

“Huu? What do you mean? It’s not your fault.” Luz just shrugs, frowning. “I was the one who went with all the others anyway even when you told me not to. I was stubborn _. I’m_ sorry.”  
  
“It doesn’t matter. I’m the one who’s supposed to make sure you’re safe, no matter how stubborn you are,” she chuckles slightly, shaking her head. “I should’ve known better than to let you stay here, but I was selfish. I wanted you to stay because I was lonely, and… now, you’re stuck here with me.”  
  
“So, you mean you regretted meeting me?”  
  
“Well— _no_ , of course not,” Eda says quickly, shaking her head. “Of course not. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to my life, and don’t you doubt that one bit.”  
  
“So, what do you mean, then?” she’s teasing her, now, a small smile forming in her mouth.   
  
“I meant… if I really loved you, and cared about you, I would’ve chosen the best for you. I should’ve made you leave because I knew that it’s not safe for you here.” She tells her. “It’s what a mother would’ve done.”

“But… if I had went home, I’d be stuck in some crazy camp and losing my mind instead of learning magic. Meeting my friends, meeting King, and… meeting you.” The girl buries her head in her chest, hugging her tightly. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, Eda.”  
  
She sighs softly. “Luz…”  
  
“And besides—I’m already here anyway, right? There’s no point in regretting anything. All we have to do now is move forward.” Luz held her hand and squeezed it tight. “Together.”  
  
Eda thought about her words for a while, then chuckles. “Since when did you suddenly become so wise?”  
  
The girl just purses her lips, smiling. “Since yesterday.”  
  
She laughs, ruffling her short hair. “Right, whatever. Come on—this is getting too sappy for me. What are we eating for dinner?  
  
“Cake?”  
  
“Nice try,” Eda tells her, smiling, “But no.”  
  
“And you said _you_ were the fun parent?”  
  
“I _am_ the fun parent!”  
  
And maybe, Luz _is_ right. She could’ve done better, she admits—but regret?  
  
No. She doesn’t regret a single thing at all.  
  


**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr blog!!](https://hereforthehurts.tumblr.com/)


End file.
